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Tinkerbellxx
Just Joined

1 Posts

Posted - 28 August 2018 :  19:10:40  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Hi all, Iím just days away from receiving my papers to sign for a trust deed and Iím so nervous. I need reassurance!!

A little background info...
Iím £18,000 in debt.
I have a loan which Iím paying off £700 per month
I have two credit cards which Iím paying the minimum on and that only covers my interest therefore Iím not paying them off!!
Once my bills are paid each month I have £100 to spend on food/fuel/social outings/birthdays/Christmas and any other expenses which means Iím just spending more and more on the credit cards which are almost officially maxed out.

I tried for a consolidation loan and only one will have me due to poor credit rating and it will have me taking my £18,000 debt and turning it into £30,000!!!!

I want a house and a mortgage...itís my aim and Iím so unbelievably far from it!!

Deep down I know itís the right thing to do but Iím embarrassed. Iím embarrassed I got myself into this situation. I donít want anyone to know what Iíve done to myself.
My parents ask me on a regular basis how my savings are going to which I lie. They then proceed to ask when Iím buying my house and whatís taking so long and itís stressing me out. Iím never going to tell them the truth, I canít. I cannot dare to see the disappointment in their faces if I told them the truth...yes itíll get them off my back but I canít do it!! And Iím petrified someone sees my name on the register and it goes around and they find out. My family are not the nicest of people so if anyone finds out Iím going to get so much crap for it and theyíll go on to my parents about how awful of a person I am and how theyíre all so much better than me.
Knowing the trust deed is 4 years is so off putting but I know Iíd take longer without it but my issue is just my embarrassment. I feel awful and guilty and disgusted in myself.

Please someone give me advice...

TheShadow
Contributor

9 Posts

Posted - 28 August 2018 :  20:12:37  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Possibly not what you want to hear, but my best advice would be to tell your parents. I went into my Trust Deed with similar fears, but found it was a relief to get it off my chest and my parents were really supportive. I would imagine it would have been a lot more stressful trying to cover things up for four years!

The rest of your family don't need to know. Again I was really worried about someone seeing me on the register, but now look back and realise it would be extremely unlikely anyone would ever come across it unless they were specifically looking for it.

Your dream of owning a house obviously goes on the back burner for now. It's not really anyone else's business why though. Getting a mortgage isn't always easy even for people with good credit, so just tell people you are waiting until you are really ready and in a position to get the house you really want- that isn't all that far from the truth anyway.

Hope that helps, and good luck.
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TDA (Debt Adviser)
Trust Deed Expert



12644 Posts

Posted - 29 August 2018 :  09:14:58  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Welcome to the forum Tinkerbellxx.

I hope that sharing the way that you're feeling as helped to take a little weight off your shoulders. Many people who have posted here in the forum over a long period of time have expressed very similar thoughts, guilt and embarrassment are two themes that come up frequently for very understandable reasons.

From a cold (debt advisory) perspective it looks like you're doing exactly the right thing according to what you have written. Continuing as you are will only take you further away from your personal goals and the expectations of your family. Acting to deal with the debts will begin to open up the possibilities you're aiming for at a future point.

Regarding the Register, as TheShadow has written it's incredibly unlikely that anyone is going to stumble into your entry there. You'd have to know that the Register exists, why it exists, and then consciously go looking for a person's details on it. Most people won't even know that it exists.

Qualified Debt Adviser & Forum Administrator - Ask me anything about Trust Deeds    
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Swandog
Advanced Contributor

70 Posts

Posted - 29 August 2018 :  09:49:17  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Hi Tinkerbellxx,

Well done reaching out for help and advice to deal with your debts. This is often the hardest step to take and I think youíre making a brave decision to deal with your debts head on rather than continue struggling for years and years.

People donít realise how common having debt is as itís still a very private and personal subject and people donít tend to talk about finances. Youíd be surprised how many people enter into Trust Deeds, Sequestration or a Debt Arrangement Scheme and the others that we donít know about who take out consolidation loans or re-mortgage their house to clear debts. Payplan and Stepchange two big organisations have reported a significant increase in the number of enquires they receive for debt advice and itís set to continue so I think Itís the way of the world now. Try not to beat yourself up too much.

If you have £18,000 of debts and after making the repayments you are left with very little to survive on then you need to do something and a Trust Deed can be a very effective way to deal with unmanageable debts as itís only 4 years.

Everyone always starts off with a consolidation loan thought but as you have seen the cost of the interest can be huge and you are taking £18,000 and turning this into £30,000. I think you have made the right choice not proceeding down this route.

Buying a house and becoming a homeowner is still possible and if you are focused enough then it will happen but it will just take a couple of extra years. You are doing the right thing taking 1 step backwards to enable you to move forward as you could struggle on for the next 5-10 years trying to pay the debts, balance transferring and not being able to save a deposit. TheShadow makes some good points about reasons why you are waiting etc. You can tell people you are saving a bigger deposit for the house that you want. A bigger deposit normally means a better interest rate and smaller mortgage payment so makes sense.

The hardest thing will be opening up to your parents and itís only a decision you can make. Iíve often read on the forum from people in a similar situation to yours who have kept everything private from friends or family but once they have opened up the support they have received has been excellent. As a parent myself all I can think about is supporting my children as much as I can and you may be surprised at your parents reaction and support.

Itís extremely unlikely that someone will see your details on the register of insolvencies. Itís only people who work in this field or people who have been through a similar process and know about the register. A google search will not bring up details of your Trust Deed either so donít worry about that.

When you say you are a couple of days away from receiving papers have you actually met with anyone face to face? I think itís always a good idea to meet the advisor and firm that will handle everything for you for the next 4 years. You also want to ensure that you receive everything in writing regarding your payments, the timescale and also how long after you make your final payment for you to receive your discharge. From following the forum some firms will do this quickly within weeks and others can take months. You want to receive your discharge as quickly as possible when you complete all of your payments.

I do believe you are doing the right thing and after a couple of months being in a Trust Deed Iím positive you will start to feel the benefit and financially a little better.

I hope this helps to give you some reassurance.
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Kevin Mapstone
Trust Deed Expert



3613 Posts

Posted - 29 August 2018 :  17:04:51  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Hi Tinkerbellxx

It sounds like you just need a bit of reassurance that you are doing the right thing. It certainly sounds like you are from what you have told us, though it is obviously hard to say without knowing your situation in more detail. Any of he experts on the site would be happy to take the time to look at things more closely for you if you so wish.

If it is of any comfort to you, from my many years of dealing with people in a similar situation I would say that where you currently are is the hardest part - ie not yet in a solution and fearful about how things may unfold. You should feel the weight lift off your shoulders once you get your chosen solution up and running and realise that you can live comfortably enough and get clear of your debts within a reasonable period of time.

You'll be surprised how quickly you get to the other end and can really start saving quickly to buy that dream house!

Recommended Partner & Trust Deed Expert - Ask me for help setting up a Scottish Trust Deed    
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np785641d
Regular Contributor

24 Posts

Posted - 30 August 2018 :  11:21:53  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Hi Tinkerbell,

You are doing the right thing. As you say the option to turn 18k debt into 30k is the wrong thing to do. I'm 3 years 6 months into my Trust deed, It's went quickly, I'm now dreaming of freedom and having my own house further down the line. The big benefit is no more phone calls and letters from creditors, You then sleep better at night, Your whole life just gets better. When you start it's like day 1 of a new life, No more lies just slowly building for a better future, You can email me on rickyshepherd@hotmail.co.uk if you want to discuss further. All the best. Its the right thing to do
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Swandog
Advanced Contributor

70 Posts

Posted - 31 August 2018 :  10:25:39  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
A nice encouraging post np785641d and thanks for sharing your story to reassure Tinkerbellxx.

Do you have 4 months / payments to go in your own Trust Deed? Remember to chase up that Form 5 Certificate of Discharge once you complete your payments.
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np785641d
Regular Contributor

24 Posts

Posted - 03 September 2018 :  10:42:43  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
i make my last payment 22nd March, It's amazing how nervous you get as the end gets nearer.
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